Michael Jackson

Father's Day

Today is Father's Day and I certainly miss my father. But it doesn't take a special day for me to miss Daddy, I miss him every day. It's hard to believe that it has been 12 years since he passed away. It just goes to show how quickly time flies by and it is a reminder that we need to nurture the relationships that is important to us as they will not always be there.

I am constantly aware that time is slipping by quickly and there is still so much that I want to do. I keep wishing that Vito would quite this foolishness about being president of his Italian club. It takes so much time and I believe it is only feeding his ego and that is what it really is about. I don't have a problem with him belonging to a cultural club, but this involves me and so much time, energy and ultimately money is spent on nothing in reality. Does any of those people really care? NO! Would they be there for him in an emergency or sickness? NO! Yet he puts all this time in and for what? Only to wake up down the road and then we will be too old to do anything. I really despise this club as I feel it is robbing me of valuable time in my life.

I think about those things as I remember Daddy telling me how in a flash, you are old and too old and sick to do the things you want to do. Here I am, wasting my life so Vito can feed his ego. Something is seriously wrong with this picture.

Instead, we should be nurturing our life together and really thinking about our future and where we should go from here.

Our house looks about as good as it is ever going to look and we pay such high taxes here, we could probably sell this place and move somewhere where we could enjoy life, and not just be a slave to a house and a club.

To bad my husband would rather nurture a fantasy instead of reality. Too bad we don't take care of each other as well as we take care of our yard.

Blueberries

It has rained for the past few weeks and although I have been worried about my garden getting waterlogged, the blueberries have been loving it. Yesterday, I went out during a brief break in the weather and picked berries from the bushes a second time this year.

The berries are plump and sweet and I love them. Not only are they tasty but they are so good for us as well.

So as one could imagine, I have been eating these things until my teeth look dingy. Even my Hannah, my dog has been eating them and she loves them too. Vito didn't even want dinner last night, he wanted cereal with blueberries.

Today we bottled wine with big Mike. That was fun and of course we had a good bit of wine drink as well. Vito had a little much and he has been snoozing it off for a while.

So I decided that since there were so my blueberries, I needed to do something with them, so I made a pie this afternoon. My house still smells wonderful, with the scent of hot blueberry pie.

I started thinking about how wonderful my berries are and really everything we grow. There is no surprise as we tend to our fruit and vegetables, weeding the garden, giving it plenty of compost for nutrients, and of course making sure it gets plenty of water. Isn't it ashamed people don't often tend to their relationships as well? Think how they would flourish if people tended to other people with such love.

Well it's time to go eat a little blueberry pie.

Still Raining

I got home from work a little early today.

Vito has gone to NYC with Susan and Sharon for a trade show and I have the house to myself for two days. I would like to have gone with them in one way, but I really need my personal and private space every once in while, which I don't seem to get enough of.

So after coming, I took Hannah out for a little walk and then I thought I would repot the Japanese Maple seedlings that I have been pampering for the past several weeks. I managed to report about a dozen of them, and then it started to rain. Now I love the rain and my garden certainly needs it, but really, enough is enough. I am beginning to wonder if we are ever going to have summer. It has rained pretty much for the past couple of weeks and now it is starting to effect my mood. Not to mention that my garden is getting boggy and the plants need a little sunshine too.

Oh well, I am just going to have to do something enjoyable indoors.

Today is Pat's birthday. I wonder if she and I will ever live close together. We have talked about it for years, but it could just be fantasy and wishful thinking. I don't dislike my home here, it is just that I have never connected with anyone here in New Jersey that is on my wave-length. The people that I seem to be attracted to for friendship that thinks the way I do, all seem to live in either the Southwest or the Northwest. There must be some reason God has put me on the east coast. Just can't figure out why.

Oh well. Everyday can't be our best. We must have some that we feel a little low and today is it. I just feel restless, not happy with work and I am sure that is a big part of it.

I dreamed about Daddy night before last. I can't stop thinking about that either. I never dream of him even though I wish I would. It was actually early in the morning and my alarm clock went off and I had to get up for work. I really didn't want to as the dream seemed so real, like he was really here. I wish that would happen more often.

Rain

Today I had planned on spending a little time in the garden after work, but on my way home it started to rain and we are having early summer thunder storms. I am not upset about this as the plants in my garden seem greener than ever and it is as if they are reaching to the sky to quench their thirst.

The rain also smells so good and the air feels so fresh, it is no wonder that the vegetation loves it so much.

Last night I was looking out about 7:00 p.m. and the most interest fog was forming off of the ground right behind my back garden. It was so unusual but beautiful that I had to take a picture of it. There was a great deal of pink in the sky and it looked like something out of a mystery movie. Beautiful and strange.